Conjectures of Heaven - By Kevin Beary - Part I

After briefly thumb-wiping off a foreign yellowish substance from the hood of his car that inevitably will find its way to blemish another vehicle, He rips open the door and bubbling with excitement hops in the drivers seat almost gracefully. Once inside he blasts his stereo on 10, and slams into reverse out of his dorm parking spot. Today was going to be the day he meets his "crush" at the library for a study session. Tina, a beautiful brunette with bright blue eyes, a small but curvy body, and blunt sensual appeal was to meet him at 12pm, Sunday at the College Library. They have been meeting for weeks now, studying for various classes at school to the benefit of both as each have been slowly raising their grades to the top of their classes.
Glancing at her watch, listening to the deafening silence of the library, Tina thought " That's not like him, he's never late ".
Tina enjoyed Mike's company and intellect. She even found him attractive, but not necessarily her type. She was intuitive enough to know his feelings for her, but was just not ready for a commitment during the last year of school, knowing she would be returning to Florida, while Mike would be going back home to Conn.
"Tina!!" he whispered loudly , at the entrance of the Library. She waved him over with a blush.
As Mike starts towards Tina, he notices the graying librarian staring down her spectacles at him with a well-practiced frown. By graying, I mean her countenance, which was a sort of pallid bloodless mask. Her hair was graying as well.
"Hi Mike" She reorganized the books and notebooks around her to accommodate him.
He sensed the librarian still fixed on him, tapping a pencil in her right claw and clutching a ruler in her left. Smiling, at the mistress of the library domain, he slowly turns his attention to Tina.
"I was thinking about what you said the other day, about heaven" said Mike. "Yes" said Tina, immediately forgetting her frustration at his lack of apology for being late.
" I agree that as earth bound peoples, trapped by the laws of nature, we may never be able to describe what heaven could be like. God in his omnipotence may be unattainable to us in our current state "
Tina sighed, " I was hoping you would find an argument to dissuade that premise"
"Sorry"
" But it doesn't mean we cant try, right?" asked Mike hopefully.
Tina says "The report I'm working on is about St Thomas who lived in 12th century Medieval England. He was killed by the king's men and was held by the people to be a martyr. The citizens revolted and eventually King Henry had to do penance and admit his deed and renounce it, thus handing more power to the church and to the people. Thomas` death, and the outrage of the citizenry, extended powers to the people previously unachieved due to the tyrannical self-serving ways of the crown. I would like to think He went to heaven and is happy there." Do you think He knows that his death was not for naught. ?
Damn I like this girl, thought Mike as he attempted to assimilate the information. He always thought he wouldn't want a "smart" girl, that they wouldn't be fun or feminine. But not this girl, her mind energized him as much as her beauty enthralled him.
" Well ... In order to answer that question, a lot of other questions would need to be considered "
"Like what?" replied Tina
"Do we go to heaven with the same minds we now possess? Are we aware of our own deaths? Are we filled with new knowledge in heaven? Do we have the ability to peek into the happenings of earth? "
Hmmm... Said Tina, "I wouldn't want an ascendance into heaven that erases all that I've known and loved. If it is like the Buddhist religions belief in reincarnation where you don't have memory of previous lives, that wouldn't be my idea of heaven."
"Memory is life...think about that" answered Mike.
"Yeah, I forgot," smiled Tina
Grinning, Mike continued, " memories are often suffused with emotion; without memories, without emotion, we are empty. " I wouldn't remember how much I like you thought Mike, but I definitely would still think you're hot.
Tina said, "Can you imagine a heaven filled with same uneducated clogs that work at the Dunkin Donuts counter. I wouldn't want to contemplate eternity with them .. a level playing field would have to be set. Maybe we would be infused with absolute knowledge."
"I would assume that people we love now would also be there in heaven" says Mike
"I would hope so or Jesus` preaching of love would have a fatalistic end to it, no. He preaches that God is love and we are all infused with a natural social tendency to love. I couldn't imagine a heaven that would not have love of fellow beings."
Mike says "lets say, a god-fearing women who marries a god-fearing man and lives a Godly life become widowed at 40 after 20 years of marriage, remarries at 50 and lives with her new love until they both die at 70. She loves both men completely. Who in heaven does she see, both? , Do they see the other partner, do they care, or do they see only what they want to see?
"Like heaven is a clever charade that plays out differently to the fantasies of all involved. " responds Tina "I doubt that"
"Like everything else, the more you question it, the more questions crop up," said Mike with a sigh. "Well, I guess we should study a bit"
"Yeah, I need a good grade"
After an hour or so of pushing and shuffling, notebooks, pencils, books and so forth, Mike looks up to see Tina finger twirling her brown locks, again.
"Your gonna twist your head right off once that uncurls" laughed Mike.
"I'm just having a tough time keeping my mind on mathematics when I'm thinking about eternity" said Tina. "See if there was a mathematical equation that could accurately compute Heaven, then maybe I would have some interest"
"I don't think I'm getting anywhere with studying today either... Lets go for a quick ride and come back." Mike says with a wink.
"I'm all for that", quickly gobbling up her books.
With a quick wave to the librarian, who by this time has turned her attention to other occupants of her domain, they depart.
.. Taking notice of the car ahead of him that looks like it is about to rust off of itself, He zips around it and lurches into Dunkin Donuts drive thru.
"You drive like a maniac" blurts Tina
Paying no mind, Mike orders "a large light and sweet coffee", "Would you like one Teen?"
" I shouldn't, coffee makes me giddy" replies Tina.
"Make that two coffees please, thanks," yells Mike into the speaker. Equally loud the speaker yells back, Drive up!
"Didn't you hear me" harumphs Tina.
"I think you're cute when you're giddy"
"Just like men, always deciding a woman's course, we might as well put on burkas and walk 10 steps behind."
"I don't think like that, Teen" said Mike looking hurt. "Isn't that a Muslim thing anyway"
"Muslims believe that paradise will hold for them 72 dark-eyed, high-bosomed virgins to deflower over and over again as their virginity is magically replenished"
"Sounds good to me", laughs Mike, "praise be to Allah"
"See, typical male responses, even Heaven is a males domain. What do the wives get to do, watch their husbands put on a show? I'm guessing as long as men run the show, we will never have a true understanding of the hereafter".
After what seems like eternity, they finally get to the pick up window. An Indian man sings "three dollar twenty cents please" Mike hands him a 5, "I have .20 cents" says Tina handing the dimes over to Mike. "I have the change, " says Mike to the cashier who promptly ignores him and hands him back his change and the two coffees all at the same time. "Thank you come again" sings the departing head from the pick-up window.
Mike hands over Tina's coffee, dropping the coins on the ground, yet retaining the singles, puts his coffee in the holder and slams the gas in frustration to leave this place behind.
"Why was that guy so rude, doesn't he know that he has all those virgins to look forward to." Says Mike as he lights up a cigarette.
"You should quit, smoking is bad for you"
"Do you think we can smoke in heaven?" quips Mike.
"I'm guessing that there are no bodily needs in heaven, but we may be able to eat for pleasure or for comradery as Jesus did after the resurrection. In that light you could smoke , but your body wouldn't have the addictive need to smoke as you do now."
"You thought about this before" said Mike in surprise
"Look out" yelps Tina
Mike slams on the brakes as that same rust bucket he passed before swerved in front of them. The sudden lack of forward motion caused all the books and notebooks in the back seat to fly forward onto the car floor in a clever mess. Tina's one hand covered her mouth while her other hand was extended towards the rustbucket, it was this hand that was holding her coffee.
Agghhhh.. Screamed Mike as a cascade of hot liquid pours into his lap...Aiieee continues Mike as his cigarette hand burst forth to brush across the car ceiling to spatter him in an array of molten embers.
Brushing off the now extinguished cigarette debris from his person into the growing muddy soup of his pant leg, He asks, "are you O.K. Tina!"
"Yes.... I told you cigarettes were bad for you"
Looking down at his wet-ash stained pant legs He replies, "very funny"
"But seriously, that's how my grandfather died, from smoking"
"He ignited himself?"
"NO" snapped Tina, "He died of emphysema, due to smoking when I was about 12.
In response to Mikes silence, she continued, "I remember seeing his body at the wake, it was so unnerving. My grandmother said he looked peaceful, but I wasn't so sure. In my mind, he looked Empty! This was a body, that used to be my grandfather and now it was Vacant!"
"Wow, that's a heavy thought for a 12 year old." Said Mike softly.
"Makes you wonder, where it goes."
"What goes"
"The soul", answers Tina, "What happens to your soul when you die, does it go straight to heaven or Hell, is it stuck in a sleeplike paralysis awaiting resurrection, or are we simply annihilated."
Mike replies "I don't believe we are annihilated. I believe there is a hereafter, or life would truly be meaningless. But where and when we go is a question of the ages. Their are those that believe the bible speaks about heaven on earth, multiple resurrections, in stages perhaps as described in revelation. In other words, Heaven is here on earth After Judgement day. Think about it, Heaven isn't mentioned as the promise to Abraham. The covenant was that he and his descendants (Israelites) will inherit the earth. They speak of Jesus` second coming (to earth). Heaven on earth.
"So where does that leave my grandfather? "
"Awaiting Judgement day"
"So you don't think we go directly to Heaven or directly to Hell?" asked Tina
"The bible explicitly states no one has gone to heaven other than Christ himself."
" I didn't know that". said Tina, inwardly processing this new information, outwardly twirling her curls.
Pulling up to the library as the spring sun winds down, a cool breeze enters the car, chilling its occupants.
"brrr...." "Let's get inside, Spring has tricked me again with its mid-afternoon warmth only to catch me unawares in a short sleeve shirt by night." Said Tina
"Yeah, you look chilly", grinned Mike, pointedly staring, not at her face.

They enter the library ....... See Part II-a